Im Alive

Heya all

Sorry for the lack of post and comments lately, life has been very hectic at the moment. I have until Friday off work so i will endevour to update with some photos and stories over the last couple of weeks!

I have been in Torquay for the last 4 days and got home today, so now catchuing up on the house work and hundred loads of washing that comes from being away!

Well hope everyone is well!

Ness

Thoughts!

I could write about how i had a great weekend and that adam and i took seb to see Thomas and Friends in Maldon on the weekend (will have to post the pictures at a later date) but today i am really going to talk about my thoughts.

It is something I haven't done in a while and thought it was time to do!!!

I am 25 year old single mum with a 2 year old son with my whole life ahead of me and the whole world around me with so many opportunities that are out there for me, but for so long something has been holding me back.

I was in a relationship with a false me, a fake identity if you would like to say that, i was NOT being true to myself! I have my job, my friends and my family to thank for helping me find my way again. But really i should be thanking myself! I don't thank myself enough! Thanks Vanessa from bringing out the True you! I lost who i was for a very long time, i lost my friends my family and my happiness for someone I loved and who i thought was going to be my soul partner. I learnt a great lesson in life! Never ever lose yourself and your identity. People should love you for who you are and accept you for who you are, you should never change for someone.

I blamed so many people for where I am today and who I am today and why things happened in my life.. but really i have only one person to blame and that is me. I chose the destiny that i took, i choose my path that i want in live.... I have learnt a hell of lot in the last 2 years, i have learnt alot of lessons, people have come and gone from my life and have taught me something! I have learnt to grow up, to take care of myself and become a mother at a young age!! I have learnt to live a balanced life and be happy and have fun!

I was in self destruction mode after I had sebastyn, and I was not happy with myself at all. How can i find love or happiness if i am not inlove and happy with myself. How is someone suppose to accept and love me if i don't accept and love myself! I am writing this because before christmas i weighed 74 kilos and i weighed myself last week and i am now 80 kgs... that is only 4 kgs off my starting weight loss!!! yeah i know!! i only have myself to blame. I was lazy, eating shit, not exercising, but i was having fun going out, drinking spending time with people i have not spent time with in a long time!!! And it has only been in the last week especially from the help of a very special person and text messages every day that i realised I can do this.. I can have everything i want in life..... I can achieve my goals and dreams and live the life that i want to live.

I have so many positive people in my life from my friends to my family to my work! who make me see things in all difference ways!

The secret has been the hot topic in alot of people blogs lately. I first watched the movie when i started my job at the chiropractors. I am only bringing this up because at our staff meeting today we watched a chapter called "the secret to health." For those of you who have seen it you will know what i am talking about! Everytime i see this bit of the secret i always cry. Not because i am sad because i am happy and i know our thoughts and minds and bodies are so powerful. They call him the miricle man.. He was in a plane crash and was told he would be a vegetable and never be able to walk again. The only thing he has was his mind, and he said that he would walk of that hospital on christmas. And he did!! Just off the track a bit!! well not really!!

There is another movie called "What the Bleep do we know" There is a part in this movie where they talk about water particles. My point here is that our bodies are made up of 90% of water. Masaru Emoto did some research on water particles. and this is in the video. I have some photos below to show you! but he shows normal water particles what it looks like then he does a pray on the water, and then he also puts wording on the bottle of water that says" You make me sick i will kill you" and "Thank - you"!! it is amazing how the water particles look. The point i am getting at, is if this is what words can do to a bottle of water imagine what our thoughts are doing to our bodies???

Fujiwara Dam, before offering a prayer

Fujiwara Dam, after offering a prayer

You Make Me Sick, I Will Kill You

Thank you

I hope you get something out of this because i sure did!

I have now realised that i was looking at exercise as a chore and not something i love to do! And from that i have now set times aside that i go into the gym and work out! Because my body needs to be healthy and Fit! I love going to the gym and i love working out. i had my first PT session last friday and got absolutely pumped.... even though i felt sick during and after it, in the long run I know i will benefit from it and I feel good! I can achieve what ever i put my mind to!!

anyways i think i have written enough for one night! expect more posts like this as i have so much i need to get out of my head!

Good nite everyone and have lovely weeks and hope to catch some of you on the weekend :)

John Mayer

Hey everyone

I had written this huge big post and lost it all on monday !! so i just wanted to let you all know that i had an awesome time at John Mayer and that there will be some photos coming.

Hope everyone had an awesome easter and gots of choccy of the easter bunny

ness

HAPPY 2ND BIRTHDAY TO MY BABY BOY

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SEBASTYN REGINALD ANDREA.

Here sebbie was just born... i can't believe how much he has changed and how grown up he has become over the last two years. Its very emotional for me actually!!!

Weekend

So i got through relay for life and had an awesome sleep last nite. Im still not feeling 100% but alot better than yesterday. I have a very sore back from coughing so much yesterday so i am definately up for an adjustment tomorrow!!! Lee (sis) and Taj decided to surprise me last nite and came over and stayed. not that i was very good company as i was not well but the boys had such fun!! when these two are together they just make each other laugh, cheeky, and copy each other.

Its sebs birthday on Tuesday so they came and gave him his presents :) He got a lightning maqueen fold out couch and a 3 set CD of zoo songs. which has all the old some like old mac donald, and baa baa black sheep and stuff.. so that was nice!!!

We also at the moment had a new addition to our household.... which i do hope goes away soon. A cat has decided for the last day to hang around!!! im not really a cat fan but all last nite it meowed at my window....

Here are some photos of the weekend

The Boys having a bath last nite.. taj loves tipping water over sebs head because seb thinks its funny

Taj giving seb a cuddle on his new lightening couch... Here they are playing on the swing set.. it looks like they are going really high in this pic but there notThis is my darling sister... She is my rock.. luv ya sis xx