Christmas, New Year and in Between

Wow!! What a huge week it has been!!! I won't go into full detail but Christmas was so not xmas this year!!

Santa came to seb from me on Christmas Eve as i didn't see him on Xmas day which was very upsetting for me but we won't go there at this stage!!! We had a good time together opening all his present. I will have to update photos at another stage as i dont know what my bro has done with the camera.. Santa brought him a guitar and the lil bugger because the way it was wrapped he knew exactly what it was.. he was saying "gutiar guitar" and was so excited when he opened it.. lots of wiggles and thomas stuff and a play swing from my family on its way!! just have to get it from Melbs to Bendigo...

Soooooo after i handed seb over i went back to Ky with my sister having a pit stop on the way to see my friend Glenn!! we rocked up and his mum offered us to stay for tea which was nice!!! we ate and off we went for a journey back to Ky..

6.30am xmas morning my lil nephew was awake... all i could here was neerrrr bang nerrr bang nerrrr bang... he got a remote control car from santa and doesn't know how to control it yet.... heheheh but very cute.. i was drifting in and out of sleep!!!!! then about 8tish my sister said go say merry xmas to aunty Nessie.. so he came into bed with me and waking me by making anoying noises in ear.. iwasn't really in the mood as i was missing seb terribly and just wanted the two of them to be together.....

So my day consisted of reading the Joanna Lees book that my sister got me for xmas!! I had it finished my boxing day and good way to drown out xmas!!! But a bloody fantastic book and what an eye opener..

Sooo lots of reading is on my agenda that the moment my sis also brought me Schpalle Corby for my birthday which is coming up, and also gave me the trisha Broadbridge book and another from Jennifer Rowe and her mother..... I love reading about crime, and real life stories!!!!

Xmas day was over about 9.30pm and what a big boxing day we had... travelling 2 and a half hours to melbs to have xmas with my dad!!!! it was cold, raining and bloody shit weather.... I was really upset that seb wouldn't be with me also to spend it with my family so opening the presents was very hard!!! but when i get him tomorrow he will have a few more presents to open :) It was good to catch up with all my bro who lives in Melbs as we don't see each other very often and just have a cruising day of relaxing and reading :)


Was back at work on thursday after having a week and bit off and my god we had the busiest two days ever since trying to get everyone in for adjustments over the xmas newyear break...

My sis came over last nite so we went out for a few drinks and where home in bed by 12.30 as she was drunk, and spent most of this morning with her head in the toilet.. Love your work Lee Pea :)

I get sebbie tomorrow and i can't wait. i have not seen him for a whole week and i not going to let him go for a while :)

Sooo won't be doing much at all for new years, visiting a few people will all that will be on my agenda..

Everyone i hope you have a safe New Years and all enjoy yourself what ever you are doing.. remember to leave your keys at home if your drinking.

I hope 2007 brings everyone happiness and lets all be grateful for what we have in our lives!

Love you all

Ness

Week of Holidays

So im on my week of holidays!!! Not that i have stopped i have spent a couple of days in Melbourne with my dad.... Seb had a great old time, and has started pretending. It was so cute!! i was lying on the couch watching TV and for about 2 minutes he was going to my bag rubbing his hands together then coming up to me and with his hands rubbing my face. then dad and i clicked on he was going to my bag pretending to put cream on his hands was saying clean then coming up to me and doing it to my face!! it was so cute!!!!!

He also loved it outside my dad has this cute little yard with some fruit trees in it and seb and i were playing chasing around them but he would bend down and look under the trees to see where i was cheeky lil sod!! : )

Well i have a cute photo of him in my dads boots!! :)

Lil poser of the camera isn't he...

My sister came on and stayed with me on monday nite which was really nice, and we stayed up until 2am.. my brother went to the robbie concert in Melbs so we waited up for him to come home but he was to tired. A friend of mine pony who is moving away came over with another friend and they stayed and had some drinks with us.... Pony stayed on my couch and said he wanted something to cuddle.. this was the outcome :)

a teddy of mine that i received.. heheheh it was close to life size as possible :)

So im not really looking forward to xmas this year!! the first xmas i will be having without my dad.. i had a cry to him before i let today!!! :) i won't be getting seb till after lunch!! then we heading over to my sisters place..... this is my dad and seb watching the wiggles today!! first time since we got down there that he watched the wiggles..

Well i suppose i better go and think about what i want for tea!!!! its too hot to eat but i suppose i better eat something!!!!

Have a merry merry xmas everyone if i don't post before then!! travel safely if you are travelling and have a fun day with all your family and hope santa brings you that special gift.

Im Missing

Im missing so much right now!!!

I wish i could have a nite sleep without my head exploding! I have not had a decent nite sleep in two weeks. Its driving me crazy!!

I missing lots of things really... My motivation has gone up north somewhere and i don't know when its going to come back!! I have none whats so ever.

Im missing my family especially my sister, there is some stuff going on at the moment with her and i just wish i could be there with her every day and make everything better! So if u read this sis i love you..

A friend of mine is leaving to go to Perth in three weeks so thats got me down a bit too, but ill cope just gives me somewhere else to go and visit.

But on the good news one of my friends is pregnant and i can't wait :) Seb have another play mate :)

And Sheree if your reading only 11 months until you get married so get planning :) hehehehe

My brother has got a girlfriend so i haven't been seeing much of him lately!!! He in honey mood period at the moment, but they are both like 2 peas in a pod :)

Maybe thats why im not sleeping, because i don't have anyone to talk to of a night time anymore because we never have 5 minutes together alone...

My child has just decided to squash his sandwich in the lino :) oh lovely!!

Well im over this smoke that is hanging around it makes me feel grose and smell yuck!!

Im off to the gym tonite for the first time in 3 weeks, don't know what i will do something lite and easy :) LOL

C- Ya

My sisters 30th

Wow i am so looking forward to my week off before christmas to try and catch up on some things. I feel like i am on energiser batteries and wondering when i am going to crash!! Between my family work and seb its been hectic.

Last weekend was my sister 30th and what a blast that was. I was dissapointed that i could not come to the bloggers xmas party but family comes first!!

Me and my sis started the night of with a yaga bomb and went from there, sharing 3 bottles of champs between 3 of us and then drinking the udls we were pretty happy by the time the night was over..

Here are some photos of my family to share with you from our day. This is a photo of all us kids, my younger brother chris and my sister Lee-Anna, me and my older Brother Harry at the front...This is the first time we have been together since Sebs 1st birthday in April, its very rare that you can get us all in the one spot at once and also still be alive :)

The middle photo is my nephew taj he the next morning he thought he would get in Allis bag ( my bros girlfriend) and put gloss all over his face..

my darling boy

this photo i love !! taken on the weekend!

BRENDA FEVOLA

Just letting everyone know that Brendan Fevola is coming to our practice on the 30th November to sign autographs and take pictures etc all welcome prizes and a signed jumper by all the players to win in a raffle!!!!! Money is going to a childrens charity. We just not sure which one yet!!! so if anyone has any ideas let me know

I need sleep

Wot a huge week i have had..

the cup was shitful i was very devastated, it rained it was cold and it rained and it was cold!!! i very put off!!! but a huge day, did lots of drinking, and lots of yaga bombs!!! never had them before and my god was i drunk drunk drunk...

I think it has all caught up with me, since i have worked this week plus the cup plus a seminar in Melbourne for work on this weekend, im bloody pooped!!! It was crazy in melbourne with the U2 concert and the g20 seminar!!!! never seen sooooo many people and sooo much traffic


Well our hot water service bursted so we were without water for three days!! That was lots of fun not!!!! I ended up getting up nice and early before work on friday and going to the gym for a work out and having a shower because i was so sick of boiling water on the stove!! :) Lucky it wasn't my week to have seb otherwise i wouldn't been going off my head!!

My sister and her lil boy are coming over next weekend which i can't wait for because its been ages since i seen them both then the following weekend its her 30th which i ammm sooooo looking forward to !!!!

heya Beckie i did that age thing and it was pretty spot on with me :) hehehe you find all these wonderful fun things to do!! I love it!!!

I can't believe this weather i so wish that it would make up its mind if it was to be hot, cold rain hail or shine!!!!!! Rain be good if your listening up there..

Its been a real struggle for me this week. I haven't seen seb much which is partly my fault because im trying to have as minimal contact with adam as possible but that is whole different post!! im missing him like crazy and can't wait to have him and snuggle and kiss him and kiss him some more this week and going swimming and do lots of fu stuff with him!!! i have missed him terribly... ( tears in my eyes) You would think that after a year that i would be use to it by now, but i don't think i will ever get use to it!! I think now that things are clearer in my head about adam etc it will get harder going week without seeing his beautiful face and hear him say bickie bickie and bike bike, and giggles (wiggles)....

I have possums at my house and there is a dog that lives next door and it is going crazy they must be out the back.. they walk along my fence to the next door neighbours house and play in the trees, just as i wrote that bang bang across my roof!!!

Well think its time for me to go slump my arse on the couch in front of the TV and get myself chilled for sleep.. i have not been sleeping much this week, keep waking up hundred times during the night which is pissing me off so hopefully i get some zzzz tonite.

Nite everyone

xxxx

Cup Morning

Wow what a morning it has been. Our pilot light went out on the hot water service last night so i had to boil water this morning to have a bath! :( i tell you not a good start to the day. besides the weather being freezing im still looking forward to the cup today! i went out last night and feeling very seedy this morning but all good have a few drinks and i will be right again

Here are some photos of me :)

Photos to share

So its been ages since i have put photos on here so i thought i would update you all from what i have been doing over the last couple of months.

This was seb sitting on me trying to make me be a horse but i had no energy. This photo was taken not long ago and since then i have had all my hair chopped off.. Short and spikey :)

These photos are of my night out with Beck at karoke!!! Had such a blast :)

Sebs crazy hair doo!! he looked so damn cute

My trip to the fairy park last weekend!! it was so much fun i will be taking seb there

So there you go!! hope you enjoyed

Stranger to this

Hello!! yes i am still alive, i feel like a stranger to this....

Its been ages i know!! very slack not enough hours in the day, and the fact that i have not set up my broadband!!!

I just opened my emails for the first time in two weeks 135 emails, and all junk mail!! yes thats right all junk mail.

Wow whats been happening. My job i am still inlove with just been working flat out there and that takes up 90% of my week!!! And then there is my beautiful lil treasure.. which i will have to undate some photos with of both of us..

On the weight loss, im getting there im down to 72 kilo now.... only another 7 to go until i reach goal..

I have been very slack with the gym and stuff though i had my first pt today in over 2 months and i tell you i cried my eyes out, i am so weak, and all my strength is gone and i was kicking myself for it!!!

I hope that everyone is doing well and i hope to catch up on your blogs over the weekend while seb is having his sleeps!!

I am off to the bendigo cup this wednesday so i will sure take some photos and put them on the site, and i might even get my broadband back up and running.

My new house with my brother is great not that we get to see much of each other, as hour working hours are completely opposite to each other.

I have been going out, i took bek out to karoke the other week and she one an eski with a radio in it, you deserved that Beks... besides that, i don't really have time for much else... i hope to get my life back into some routine soon...

well take care guys and talk soon

xxxx

Welcome from the New Pad

Heya Everyone

Well first i would like to welcome you all to my new place :) hehehe i will have to take some photos and put them on here. I am nearly settled in.. still have a few boxes to unpack, but besides that i am loving the new place.

I don't have broadband here yet but using dial up which is really slow and i am so not use to it.

I have been really good, enjoying myself and spending time with all my friends and fam.

I have been motivated this week as i have not been to the gym in ages and ages and so far have been every day this week. I think now that i have the new place and feel safe and have my bro here with me, i am starting a new chapter in my life. I really want to lose this extra weight that i have before xmas which means i have to knuckle down and put in the hard yards

I am going out to tea with Beck tonite, which i am looking forward to, as we have not had much one on one time together lately. Lil bradman will be with us which i am also looking forward to .

well gang just wanted to update and hopefully over the weekend i will catch up on everysone blogs

If we were meant to be

I had some stuff i needed to get off my chest so i wrote this poem

If we were meant to be my eyes would glitter with happiness
If we were meant to be my heart would be fulfilled
If we were meant to be i would feel love
If we were meant to be i would miss you when we are apart
If we were meant to be i would smile with joy
If we were meant to be i would melt with every touch
If we were meant to be i would be content
If we were meant to be i would know what true love is.

Please explain

I am a bit dumb founded at the moment. I had weigh in yesterday. After 3 days of drinking and partying and eating crap i managed to lose a kilo and a half and my body fat went down. I just don't understand how!!!! So i think i have to work extra hard this week to make sure i keep it off!!!

My weekend is going to be a cruiseee one!! i am going to Rindas house for a bbq tea tonite, as they haven't seen seb in ages, and rinda's lil brother Jem is a music buff and seb loves that.. Tomorrow im going over to see my nan and parsie who have been away travelling north for the past 3 months, so it will be good to see them and then off to Stay with Lee for the nite, and let the lil ones run wild :) I spoke to my sis on the phone last nite and her lil boy taj has been saying when sebbie come to stay, and he going to sleep with me :) So im really excited because i want them to be close cousins :) It was actually really funny because when i got on the phone he said wheres sebbie and i said hes asleep, and he said aunty nessie go and wake him up!!! I just thought that was so cute!!

well i better get going as its such a beautiful day out ther i thought i might walk back to work!!

See Ya

XMas List

Hey guys

I have started my dream xmas list at the side of my blog which when i think of something i need i am going to add too. Its not too far away so i thought i would get my ideas out there!!

Happy reading my family and friends

Its time to say Good-Bye

before i start this has some offensive langauge!!

So my head is a bit of a scramble at the moment, so much going on, but trying to keep positive about it all!

I have not had much sleep in the last 4 days, nor have i stopped drinking, and eating shit, which really hasn't helped my mood at all!!

Today i am at home with seb as he is not allowed at creche as he has been sick. Also over the weekend my relationship with adam came to a new stage. That its over!!! And even though its hard, i feel good about it!! Its the right decision... A few things happened over the weekend that made me realise that i don't have to put up with him anymore, his actions anything!

Friday nite i went out on the town with my friend Karen it was way heaps fun until i lost my brand new phone, but anyways i got home and i get this knock on the door about 4.30 in the morning, and it was adam, he came around because he thought i picked up and brought someone home, then on saturday night i went out with another friend of mine rinda, and just as we were pulling up in the taxi he was doing a drive by my house. so i rang him and asked what he was doing and he said seeing if i was home!! Like hello, stalker..... i was so mad at him!!! and then he tells me that i don't deserve seb as my son.. For fuck sake, it was my weekend off, i wasn't the one out driving while my son was at home in bed, and he tells me i don't deserve my son... (just let me make it clear that he lives with his sister who was home but thats not the point!!!) So that was kind of the last straw for me!!!

As much as i want my son to have his father and mother under the same roof it would all be for the wrong reasons!! Adam keeps saying what about seb, we need to do this for seb. But what about ourselves!! What about my feelings, my heart, my life???? Why should i be in a realtionship that makes me unhappy for the sake of my son??? I think the biggest thing that really sank in, was that i looked at like i love adam, but im not "in love" with adam and that makes all the difference to me!!!

it so emotionally draining and i know things will get better over time, i have a beautiful son, a loving family, fantastic group of friends, a fantastic job, and a new place, i just need to keep thinking of the positive and everything will be fine.

Well i might go and have a nap while seb is sleeping!!

Ciao

Ouch

My head hurts, im hung over, and dizzy but still managing to write this blog on this windy day!! so if it doesn't make sense that is why!!

Ouch because i lost my brand new F*%$ing phone last nite while out! :( i am guttered.... rang telstra the other day to renew my plan they said hey we will pay off your old phone and give you a new one for free. One of those Video phones i was like sweet!!! anyways got it and learnt how to use it and bang its gone!!! so now i have all these accessories and no flamin phone.... Anyways i might just go into telstra and get a phone on a plan :(

Ok well now ive had a sook i feel better!

have a good one everybody!!

The Lady In Red

Well i had an absolute blast in Ballarat on the weekend. I felt sexy and i loved my red dress!!! and i didn't break an ankle in my shoes!!! We left on saturday and where we stayed was beautiful. I drank beer all night!! and actually thought i would wake up worse for wear but i didn't.

Here are some photos of our night!!
this is me

this is me and my bro



So there is so pics... i had a ball dancing!!!!

On two good notes, i have just been on the phone with Telstra... to renew my plan and welll, i won lottery today!!! they are paying out my old phone $413 to go for free and i am getting a new c3 video phone for free!!! i am getting 2 months of music downloads for free and my 1st month for free which is $79.00!!! i also get 450 worth of free calls a month so im excited...

Allllssoooo today i got a phone call from the real estate agent and i have a new house to move into!! there has been so issues with this house, i am scared living here and i don't like my neighbours so me and my brother are going to move in together again, this time in a bigger house with more space for the 3 of us.. Im very excited!!!! Its a great opportunity for us both to save some money!!!! As i am heading overseas next year for 2 weeks!!

Well i better get my arse into gear and organise some things now!!

Talk to you all soon

Hello

I am such a slack arse lately!!! Ummm where do i start!!! Well lots has happened over the last week.. I went to Kyabram on the weekend to spend some time with my sister and we went to a ball that was awesome. Photos to come!!!! I got absolutely plastered and didn't get home until 5.30am in the morning!! Ohhh god i felt so old!!!!!! i don't know how people can do that every weekend!!!!!

I am very proud of myself! I ran on the treadmill at the gym last week for 20 minutes. First time i have ever done it!! i was so proud of myself!! I couldn't kept going but i didn't want to kill myself!!

Ummmmmm what else!! I caught up with Miss Beckie Boo on wednesday... Ohh what a blast of day we had today!!! I have another ball to go to this weekend in ballarat so we went shopping fo some shoes and had so much fun. thanks so much for your help.

so here are some photos and sneek peeks of what i will be wearing. The rest you will have to wait for!!! so as you can see the bottom of my dress and the shoes! stayed tuned

The Melbourne Zoo

What an awesome day! Adam and I took seb to the zoo for the first time. It was good to have a family day together :) Seb loved seeing all the animals especially the lions. They were going off tap. walking right past us roaring, it literally sent shivers down my spine, to have them so close....

I got a movie of the lions and once i figure out how to put it on i will upload it, unless anyone can tell me!!


This is seb with a baby baboon he was saying hello :)

Catch up

Well hello everybody!! What a busy time it has been for me! i have finally caught up with everyones blogs and how fantastic everyone is doing with weight losses.. Its fantastic.

I have had a dreaded sinus infection that has finally gone.. i felt like i had a migrane 24/7 in my forhead it was horrible!!!

Sydney was awesome, except that it rained the whole time i was up there, which sucked because back in good old Bendigo it was sunshine!!! I learnt lots more about being a chiropractic CA and becoming my confident in myself and in my work!!

Mmm what else, seb has just become so independent. as you will see from the photos, he likes to feed himself now!! Mmmmmm what a fun clean up job it is.

Cheeky lil bugger. I am getting him weighed and measured next wednesday its been ages since i have had it done, so it will be interesting to see!!! He is learning more words every day and it won't be long before he starts putting sentences together.

I got myself weighed today. Its been ages since i have updated you i have been oh so very slack. i weighed in at 74.2 and my body fat is at 41.1% !!!! i have lost 10.5kgs since i started.

Im feeling good within myself but i just want to reach goal and feel that extra good about myself. Beckie everytime you come into work you always complementing me, thanks so much, it makes you feel good....

I got a F&*%ing $290 gas bill in the mail the other day i was sooooo shattered.... os upset and so grrrrrrrr... when i don't have seb i am going to freeze as i don't need another one of those coming my way!!!!

I start extra shift this week at work which will be good money wise but will have to get my butt into gear and get organised.

Well its my day off today and i got all my washing done thank god, its such a beautiful day, i walked into town with seb which was good cause he had a sleep, and now he is having another sleep... I got a PT tonite :( arrggghh oh so not looking forward to it!!!

Well i might go and read a book and chill for a bit while lil is sleeping.

Take care everyone and ill try and post a lil more regular

Luv You

My god i didn't realise how long it has been since i posted last and so much has happened.

Right now i feel like someone has hit my over the forhead with a metal pole. I don't know what is going on with my head so this post won't be a long one as i really can't think straight at the moment

Firstly seb started saying love you last week. It sure brought a tear to my eye and just hearing those words come from his mouth makes my day.

I went to sydney on the weekend for work which was once again awesome! I love sydney.. i think i could live there.

I have been really naughty with my eating and excercising has been slack, but i have now set my personal goals each week with work which now is motivating me to move my arse into gear.

4 now that is it

Motivation

Ok so i got motivation. I was up at 5.30am this morning and went and did combat in at the gym, mowed my lawns and whipper snipped, had a massage, cleaned my house a lil and even had time to shave my legs. It was so good to have a day to myself to do what i wanted. Its been ages since i have done this. I feel really good.

I was suppose to go out for breakfast with my brother, but i came back home after combat and feel asleep and my phone rang about 9.30am and it was my brother asking where i was.. hehehe i had slept through the alarm.. i needed the sleep..


Well going to cook spag bowl for tea. Mmmm my favourite

Untitled

I don't know what to title this blog.... I just want to make it clear to people that read my blogs, that the reason i write my blog is so that i can get off my chest what i am feeling and to let the people who read my blog know whats happening in my life right now. You might not agree with what I do, and that the whole world can read about my life, but so be it, i choose to do it. Its also about getting support from other people who have been through the similar situations, its about supporting each other through hard times, through the weight loss through what ever. So if you want to go running back to people, about what i have written in my blog then so be it, because i really don't care and i don't have to justify myself, or what i write. If you have a problem with what i write then don't read it, also usually when i write about certain people in my blog i usually have spoken to them about it anyways. My feelings are my feelings and I choose to express them however i want. And this is the way i am choosing to express them.

Scattered Thoughts

I have just been reading becks blog, and how upset she is with herself about the way she looks etc. I have not known someone with the kindest heart, senerity and affection as she has, and to read about her being down on herself has touched me. The point i am getting at is that i posted a message to her. I have been reading a book by an inspirational man called Dr John Demartini. The book is called " How to make one Hell of a profit and still get to heaven". It is absolutely fav book and not only has it made me learn about money finance etc, it has also taught me about positive quotes, sayings etc and how the mind is so powerful. A quote i wrote to beck was " Whatever you think about, thank about, you bring about" This really gels with me, and hopefully it does to others, and hopefully people can see the meaning behind it. So i contridict myself when i said in my last blog that i felt like a fat hefalump in that photo. because if i think that i look like a fat hefalump then i am a fat hefalump. Does that make sense.

I have also learnt about stability and control, and self control, and how the universe won't let you expand if you can't control what you have at the moment, so for me, when i learn how to discipline myself with money and learn to save, then i will get more money, payrise etc. Please don't worry if none of this makes sense to you, and please know that i have not joined a cult or anything, i have just been doing alot of reading and watching dvd's with work and have learnt alot and how it applies in my life.

So for me to have stability and control in my life, i need order. I need order in my house, finance, emotions, physically, love life. So my first step was opening up a saving accounts that earns me interest to help me save.

I have laid down the ground rules with adam. I have said to him that i am sick of being in limbo land so you either want to be with me or you don't simple. I know where I want my life to head and I know what i need to fulfill it, so we both stop playing games and we sort out our problems and we be together or we part, and just be there for Sebastyn. I need happiness and love and support. He eithers gives it to me or he doesn't. and i move on.

I have a job that gives me stability and I love my job and i have so much room to grow and expand, and im determined to take my career as far as i can go now.

I am determined to get the lingerie business up and going with Beck, and make it happen and make it successful.

I want the best for my son and for myself, and to know that i am comfortable in my life.

I am determined to drop this last 10kgs that i have to go. for 5 weeks now i have been at plato. I have been lazy with eating, exercising, i need to get off my arse and do something about it! Be healthy, energetic, feel sexy, have self worth, confidence, not only for myself, but to be able to play with my son and my nephew. I want to be an active mother, Im young...

Wow my head feels lighter after spitting all this out!

The Ball, Geelong and My week

Hey Guys, glad you all had a good time at the bloggers meet, im sorry i could not be there but i ended up having to look after sebastyn. But next one ill be there for sure.

So the ball was great... i got plastered and ended up home at 2.30am. I was drinking vodka Freezes 7% alcohol so i wasn't surprised that i woke up feeling like crap and that i needed to have a spit :)

We had a beautiful two course meal i had chicken stuffed with rice and a cheeseeee sauce. And pumpkin soup it was soooo yumm..

I got up and had a dance and a mingled with the footy boyz and girls. They had a live band who must of been big fans of cat stevens because they played sooooo many of his songs... Overall it was a good nite and it was good to go out with Adam, even though i didn't see much of him. hehehe

Below are some photos from the ball! I felt like a hefalump next the girls cause they so little but i still felt great.

So its me on the left Beck and Kaz who are cousins.

I had some hollywood tape happening to keep my boobs in. If you want to look at the photo closer click on it.

So this is adam and I

So there is some pictures for you.

On wednesday i took sebastyn to Geelong i needed some R & R and it was the first time he had been at that beach and he loved it. He chased the sea gulls for ages and picked the sand up in his hands and would chuck it everywhere. Anyways back in our room where we were staying was a desk and chair. And Lil one has no fear whats so ever. We went shopping and i brought him some tic toc biscuits. anyways i said to him that he had, had enough but he was determined to get more. So below i took some photos of his determination.

Climbing on the chair getting the packet of biscuits

and standing

He has no fear and that scares me sometimes. He is always walking to strangers, waving good bye to people he doesn't know, i suppose its just part of him learning and growing up! He is saying lots of words now which is great and he is trying so hard to have a conversation with you but it won't be long.

My week has been good, i have actually been to the gym more than once this week. I have put my foot down and have got some extra motivation from somewhere so hopefully now i can get my arse into gear and lose this last 10 kgs i need to lose and hopefully get my body fat down.

Well im off to do some reading and have some quiet time since i have no child.

Ciao

My week of eating

I said the other day that i post what i have been eating, hoping that it will make me have some restraint on what junk i eat.. Well i think this week has been ok. I have not updated my weight in ages due to that i have not had a weigh in but i did on tuesday and it has stayed the same.

I have gone back on having slim shakes for brekfast now, to try and help with my weight lose as i was not eating breakfast and as you all know we need to have breakfast to kick of our day.

Wed

B/Fast
Slim shake
Lunch
Baked potato and hot chocolate
tea
chicken stir fry with hokiin noodles honey and garlic sauce

Thurs
B/Fast
slim shake
Snack
apple
Lunch
Left over stir fry
snack
dry fruit and nuts

Fri
B/Fast
slim shake
snack
dried fruit and nuts
lunch
chicken roll with lettuce
tea
maccas

So i think overall i have been ok...

Tonite i have to footy ball and i am so excited. i can't wait.... i will hae updates of pictures for you.

have a good weekend everyone
xxx

ONE dead mouse and my 100th Post

Sooo for my 100th post ill be talking dead mice :) I woke up this morning to give seb a bottle and low and behold there was a mouse in the middle of my kitchen floor. Its scrared the absolute shittaaaasss outta me!!! I took one step down and it didn't move. It was sitting there with its tail curled around. and i thought ohh my god its got friendly!!! So i got a ice cream container and put it over the top of it and it still didn't move and then put a huge container of water on top of that so it could go anywhere... I texted adam and said please come around and remove the mouse from my kitchen... and he did thank god otherwise it would still be sitting there dead....

Pest control will be around this week to bait my house and get rid of the rest hopefully!!!!

So hopefully there will be some peace and quiet in my house without mice :)


I have my first inspection for my house next month and I asked them today if i could put a sand pit in the back yard for sebastyn and they said yes so i think thats great.. gives him something to play with outside instead of going and hiding in the outside toilet all the time...

Well my day off today has been productive and lil man is having a sleep at the moment, and my dad and his wife are coming to baby sit this weekend, so im trying to get the house all cleaned :) hehehehe.... knowing mazza i will come home from my ball and the house will be spotless :)

Toodles for now!!

& House Keys Locked inside

Mmmm well as if my weekend wasn't an entertaining one, last night i locked my keys in the house. I actually think it was Karma!!! I had a fight with adam on sunday nite and told him to give me the spare key back so of course he did, and my luck my brother came around last nite so take me to get some tea and what did i do. walked straight out the bloody door without my keys!!!! I tell ya my head not screwed on lately!!!

Im enjoying walking everywhere. i was up and out of the house by 7am this morning! and the stars where still out!! Its a nice walk to and from work!! I have sebastyn this week so don't know how i will be taking him to creche on friday!! might be going by taxi!!!

Well i better go clean my house up before adam brings seb over!!!

Got the footy ball on saturday so will have to make sure i get some photos for you all

ill actually be in a dress, wearing make up and have my hair done.. so very rare for me, so make sure you treasure the photos :)

Chow

"Loose", Broken Car , Human Pooh

Mmmmmm what a fun filled weekend i have endured! I went to my sisters on Friday nite after work, to chill and enjoy some family company! It was a fantastic weekend until coming home today!

Firsty i learnt the new slang. just shows how much i get out. "Loose" is a word they use alot of there. "Oh my god shes is in "loose" form tonite".........

We went to the footy yesterday and that was, caught up with some people that i hadn't seen in a long time! then last nite we went out to the pub for a few drinks and a boogy! that was fun....

Lee drove my car down the street and parked it in a public car park. When we went to pick it up this morning some disgusting person decided to stand on my bonnet and do there numbers 2!! I was so disgusted... who the F&*%$ would do that???

Then driving home today just coming into Bendigo my car decided to die!!! Yeah great fucking car.. thank god my sister was following behind me.... i got out and gave it the biggest kick!!! Im over it!!!!! so now i am without a car for gods knows how long!!!! will be getting my exercise this week that is for sure.. So my great weekend ended in shit!!!

But on a good note my bro was in Bendigo playing footy today and my uncle so was good to catch up with the family, and my uncle finally got to meet sebasty because he has never met him.. so yeah..

well im outta here i can't be bothered writing anymore....

News has sickened me!

I have cried and I have been sickened by the death of an innocent 8 year old girl in Perth who was raped and strangled in a shopping centre yesterday! You sick bastered! How could any human being be so cruel and vial? When something like this happens to a child it really hits home and makes you think that that could have been your child!!! Male or Female.

Cherish every moment with your children family and friends because you don't know when it could be your last!

ok must go i have a teething screaming child sitting on my lap making it very difficult for me 2 write.

my thoughts are with the family in perth!

xxxx

Menopause?

Help me im starting menopause already!!! Well im home sick from work today as i woke up at 2am this morning wet from having hot and cold flushes all night!! My bodys way of getting rid of what ever bug i have in my system. I have gone through half a box of tissues already and have slept nearly all day today! thought i better wake myself up otherwise i won't sleep tonite.

Congratulations to Nic & Keith but i was really disappointed in her dress! with all the money that she has you would think that she would of had something modern. Puff Puff arms come one!! Anyways every taste is different i suppose.

Mice are not Nice

Firstly Beck came overon wednesday and visisted with Bradman. It was so much fun and it was good to catch up. The boys where so funny.. so go check out Becks blog for some update pics of Seb and also Bradman.

Secondly, I have super mice in my house!! they are eating my lino they are leaving there droppings everywhere and its making me sick.. So over the last couple of weeks of i have been trying to get rid of them!! Mmm with mice traps but they have been to smart and getting their food and running away, so now i am trying the bait. they are throw bags that the mice eat and are SUPPOSE to die.. well i have gone through 4 packets of this stuff and the mice are still living!!! MMMMMM so now comes the hard stuff.
Pest control are coming in to get rid of my stinky furring yucky ugly friends that have been living in the bottom of my oven..
........ So while seb has been having his sleep this morning I have been in my kitchen with the pino clean and have cleaned all the walls my table my benches, my cupboards the floor everywhere they have been to get rid of the smell and to kinda feel clean!!! But the smell is still on my nose. and i still don't feel clean!!!

I have decided that i am going to keep a food log in my blog now!! It thinking it might straighten me out with not eating so much junk.

Well my lil precious has decided to rise so im going to meet a friend for lunch..

catch ya's all

Vanessa where are you?

My god, how busy can one person be. right now i don't really know where is vanessa is!! I have been that flat out that i have not really had any time to myself! I do hope that things will slow down soon!

I had my sister up last week and that was fun it was good to spend a couple of days with her. We are organising to go on a contiki tour in September next year so i am looking forward to that :) 15 days travelling around europe :) Its something i have wanted to do for ages and I would really love to do it with my sister and some other people that we know. So i have a goal set for myself now :)

What else has happened. so much so muc.. i went to melbourne on the weekend to look for a dress for the ball that i have coming up but do you think i could find anything?? NOPE.. nothing fitted.. my boobs where to big for everything :(

Sooo i have now opted for a skirt and dress, least i will be a little bit girly :)

I have been not 100% this week, as i have not been looking after myself i have got run down and have had a chest thing happening!! Im getting there though.

Sebastyn is doing really well, learning lots of words.. they have been weaning him to the bigs kids room at creche when i say big kids i mean the 1 - 3 yrs and after the holidays he will be going up there full time... Apparently he was getting bored and there is more to do in that room so as long as it is good for his development i am happy. But i went to creche the other day and spoke to them about it as i was being the worrying mother and they told me that sticks up for himself, and that he has been fitting in good!!

Work is still good i still love it, and it keeps me busy!!

Im going to borrow my bros camera one of these days and take some photos.....

My weight has stablised at the moment.. but im content at where i am at the moment as live has just been so busy for me, but i am plodding along and will reach goal weight at some stage.

Well i think thats about it for now!!!

Lazy

I have become so lazy with my blogging lately! I think its more a need to find time to blog with such a busy life. Work takes up so much time and i seriously need to get myself organised and prepare for my weeks.

The long weekend was a busy weekend for me! I went and stayed with my dad for one nite. I feel that things have changed. Its weird i feel when i go and see dad now im not going home. Does that make sense. I just feel that i have to tred on egg shells when im at dads. Its not like a home its more like a palace that has everything in place and things can't get messy or you can't make a mess! But besides that i caught up with my aunty who i haven't seen in ages and it was really nice to see her. She has a labradoodle dog and its huge and seb had sooo much with him..... its was funny... Coby could of eaten seb all up!! :)

I am really spewing that i have not found my digital camera as there have been so many photograph moments of seb that i have not been able to catch. I am going to have to borrow my brothers camera and take some photos and update you all on how much he has grown. He is very cheeky and copying everything. I must go and get him weighed and see how he is going.

The exercise and eating has been really crap lately, but on a good note i ran for the first time at the gym on tuesday for 15 minutes and my shins didn't hurt, so im pretty proud about that!!

I have to balls coming up at the start of July so next weekend im off to melbourne to go dress shopping. Im looking foward to getting dressed up and having my hair and make up done, as most of you who know me well im not a girly girl!!!! So i will have to put a photo of me in a dress on here because it will be one a million :)

I hope that everyone had a good break over the weekend.... I actually did get my house clean, but that didn't last long with seb getting into everything and making a mess :)

Well im off to Bed its been a big day. My sister has come to stay for a couple of days.

I had a friend visit

Well its been a while since i updated... Firstly i was thinking about paying out my gym membership because im sick of it coming out fortnightly but i dont really have 2 grand spare.. i was so shocked when i found out.. but thats what im paying for my gym and my PT sessions and my slim meetings...

Im really driving myself to try and save money as i really want a new car and i really want to get my own house..

I had a friend visit me on monday morning just i was about to jump in the shower... A fucking huge mouse i nearly broke my toilet seat as i jumped up onto it!! I was so mad!!!

Also i have been in this house for 5 weeks now not only have i still got 5 boxes to unpack i had my first bath on satruday nite.. but it wasn't without being interrupted :( but anyways i got it and thats all that matters.

My lil man is getting his molers at the moment :( so he has not been well but he is still cheeky as ever!!! he is saying more words his latest is "bath"!!!

I think im ready for a holiday!!! i have not stopped since i started work and its really draining me!!! I have my sis coming up next week so that will be good.. im looking foward to that.

Night everyone.. got to get myself ready as its my week to have lil one!

xx

I forgot about how much Pain.......

There is when your getting a PT!! Awwww my god.. its been about 8 weeks since i had a PT at the gym and im feeling sorry for myself today. Not only is my butt sore my thighs and hamstrings i can't hardly sit down and get up!!! I had a massage this morning thinking it might help but i don't think it has, i must keep stretching today and moving to help release this soreness from my body.

Im glad im back doing them though because now im pushing myself and building my strength back up.

Im really excited my sister is coming to stay with me in two weeks time... Its been ages since just me and her hanged out so im looking forward to doing some sister things together!!

Well my lil man is having a sleep so i might get some house work done while i can.

I feel Lost!

It has really hit me today about me being a single working mum! I use to go off my head that adam didn't see his son enough and now the tables have turned!

Not only is seb a lil daddy's boy and everything is daddy and him wanting to spend time with daddy, but I feel lost. friday morning i started work at 7.45am. I was up at 6.30 had a shower and got ready for work. Woke seb up at 7.00 changed his bum packed the car and off to creche it was. Mmmmm i spent a whole 10 minutes with him. When i dropped him off at creche he screamed his head off, because he didn't want me to go! Im really missing the time that we had together and I feel because i work late nights and he is spending all his time with his dad that im losing the connection we had. Its hitting my heart and it hurts. Like today. Adam was around to help me with my student desk and he had to go home for a bit, and he picked seb up to give him a kiss good bye and i put my arms out to get seb off him, and he didn't want to come to me, he kept turning his back to me... over and over again... Adam said to me to stop being silly and not to take it to heart but how could i not, when my own son didn't want to be with me. Its just been a few lil things this week that have happened with seb that make me realise am i being to strict on him? should i loosen the string a bit?? But then there is the nasty side of me that is saying no, you don't want a spoilt child who gets away with everything. I think seb has realised who lets him do stuff and who doesn't. he may only be 14 months old but he knows. Children are smarter than we give them credit for!

Can someone make some sense of what im going through here? or am i worrying about nothing and if that is the case someone tell me to pull my head in!!

Sydney

Well i spent the weekend in sydney at a conference for work, and met some more chiropractors and their CA's ( chiropractors assistance) and it was overall and very exciting weekend. I learnt lots not only about myself but how my bosses now want their business to run and what they want to achieve..

I learnt alot about universal laws and headspace, and how powerful your mind and concsious is and how it can affect your day to day routines, thinking etc..

One tip that i really liked and will start doing more of is journelling more, and writing appointments and day to day activities in a diary.. WHY.. well look at it this way, when we say that we are going to go for a walk today, most of generally won't do it. But when we actaully write it down in the diary and give it a time and a place we generally more incline to keep that appointment.. so if i say im going to go for a walk today from 9.30am - 10.30am around the lake, i know i will do it.. Does that make sense??

mindset is very strong.... Synergy is very strong!! And having personal goals is important for everyone.. If you wake up in the morning going i hate going to work, i hate my life blaah blaah of course your going to have a shit day.. but if you wake up in the morning knowing you have purpose you have something that you want to achieve then your day is going to be fantastic because you know you are that one step closer to achieving your goal. So for me im going to work not only because it is fulfiling for me, but i have to support my son, and im saving for a new car, so i look forward to working every day!! Looking at things as positives instead of negatives all the time.

When i first started my bosses said to me that it is so important to concentrate on your patients that are coming in for the day, that the appointment book is full, etc and i was like ohh right,, then what i klearnt on the weekend, made it all make more sense to me.... If your thinking about what is going on in your life, what you have to do after work, etc your patients are more likely to ring up and reschedule or cancel to give you more time to think about yourself.. where as if your thinking about your patients and how they are coming in today to help get their spine aligned so they can function to their full potiential, they are more likely to make their appointment.

They energy in the office on monday was fantastic.... and not only was it one of the busiest days that i have had since being their, we had 3 new clients ring in and book in for that monday.. so it was good...

THIS WEEK IS CHIROPRACTIC WEEK so please look after yourself and go and see a chiropractor.. try something alternative before turning to medicine. Not only have i seen the benefits that it is doing to me, and sebastyn, i want other people to understand the importance of being healthy. Its not only about your spine correct, and your nerves functioning properly and allowing your organs to function, but its also about what your putting into your body. So many processed foods are so bad for you. When Beck first told me that Matt made all food fresh and from stratch i was like hell i don't have time for that.. But now i see the importance. If you can eat only one thing organic try and make it your meat. Processed meat is very high in chemicals and fat...

On that note, im going to have a shower and get myself ready for work while seb is sleeping.

Week 16 - Weigh in and 11CMS less Arse

Wow what a week i have had... Sydney was awesome exciting and beautiful!! learnt lots and can't wait to see what my future holds for me.
I got Measured this week and sheree was giving me my overall lost of cms.. and i have lost 11cms off my butt!!! Weight went down but body fat hasn't so i have to work on that... so back to food diary.

Well i have a lil one trying to steal my computer so i must be off.. i will update more when i have a moment of peace.

Ness

Weigh in Week 14 & 15

Ok first update i will do is i love my job... the people i work with are great and the clients are great and i feel great..

Weigh in Week 14 I weighed in at 76.4 and this week I weighed in at 75.5 kgs.. So guess what I have 9.5 kgs to go to goal weight. How exciting is that?? Im excited i tell you.

Im feeling good about myself and feeling healthy even though im not eating enough. im eating lots of soup the last couple of days because i finish work late its something easy to cook and eat.

Well thats, that out of the way..

Okkkk i don't really know where to start....

MY HOUSE!! i will have to borrow my bros camera and take some photos. i have been here nearly 3 weeks and im so not settled in yet.. hahaha funny that when you work and have a child.... maybe sometime soon i might have some stability in my life... LOL

MY JOB- Well i am what they call a chiropractic assistant, and i love my job i really do.... i am off to sydney this weekend for a conference which i am looking forward to. Weekend away with my bosses, get to learn a little more about them :) I have just started learning rooms as i have been on front desk for the last 2 weeks and i tell you when u are in rooms you have no concept of time.. Its amazing seeing the chiropractor at work and how she does things. I have been getting adjustments the last few weeks and i have been taking seb also and it does wonders. my body is changing slowly, but i can feel the changes... and in the long run it will be better for my health and well being.

MY SON - Seb is a little terror and i love him to bits.. he is growing up to this lil young man so quickly.. good first impressions he made on saturday nite out for Becks tea though. Spewed everywhere didn't he beckie???? Was lovely!!!! Sorry Brock and Michelle :) hehehehe hopefully next time you see him he might be happier.

MY EXCERCISE - LOL hahahaha what exercise... i have been so slack, but i am tyring to get myself into a routine.. but im starting back PTing next week which i am looking foward to as i have been losing weight but not the body fat and i need to get that down. Aiden who is one of my bosses is so good full of information. i could talk to him all day about eating and exercise etc, but one thing that i am trying to do is eat organic. so seb and i have been having organic milk and veggies as i am trying to cut down on the chemicals that we put into our body.Also a tip that he gave me... You should drink 1 ltr of water to every 30kgs you weigh every day. so there is something useful for you. I am going through a lot of changes in my life right now, but its all for the good, and its about me having the energy levels i need to keep me going every day and to be able to play with my lil boy and be able to do the things that i want to do.

MY FRIEND BRON - Well my friend bron has been overseas since october has fallen in love with a aussie bloke and now is back for a few weeks. but we can't catch up which is a bummer and i miss her... and so we talking on the phone the other day and she won't be back again until march next year.... think i might have to save my pennies and go and visit her in canada... Can be a goal that i can aim for :)

Well i have to start work nice and early in the morning so i should get some shut eye.. hope this is an update to keep you all going.... i can' wait to read everyones blogs and see how you are all going and what you been up too!!!

Until next time, which won't be that long away... Take care and smile at a stranger!! you will make their day

xxxx

Howdy!

Just quick note, the net has finally been connected at my new house.. Yippie.. just about to go to work for the afternoon, but tonite will be a hugggeee catch up night so be prepared for lots and lots of reading... and i can't wait to catch up on everyone else... i miss you all

Ness
xxx

Weigh in - Week 13 & and a House Finally

So its been two weeks since i have been weighed. but i weighed in at 77.1 and body fat the same. the last two weeks have been very draining on me with work and trying to get into a routine. I have not exercised i have not eaten properly so i need to get some order in my life.

On a positive note i am loving my job, I love the environment, I love the people I work with, and im learning lots about the body and health.

I am having adjustments done to my back, and yesterday I had x-rays done to see what areas of my spine need work! I am also taking sebastyn in today to have his first visit and determine if chiropractic can help him.

On another positive note, i finally got a house. which i move into on saturday. I am so excited and so happy that everything is finally working out for me! Its 3 bedroom has a huge backyard and has a bath. so the first thing i am going to do is have a bloody bath since its been s long.

Well i can smell a nasty smell coming from sebastyns lil bottom so i must go change it and get on with my day.

Hope everyones week has been good and i hope to catch up with everyones blogs soon.

Ness
xxxx

Dear Beck

Well its been a while since we have caught up and I have some funny news for you.

Last year as you know when we went and watch Lion King. And you know how you took me shopping and I got the knee highs! Well guess what i have just discovered? That they are two different shoes. *LOL* I laughed so hard, and thought to myself how blonde was I? and how blonde was I not to notice? One is a bit longer, shinnier and has a sort of added bit of leather and the other is just plain! But you can't really tell unless your having a good look.

So there you go, next time ill try and take more notice!

Ness

"I love you Sebastyn"

I had the best weekend this weekend, and the scariest weekend all at once. I went on an adventure.

My friend sheree and my Personal Trainer asked me to go camping with her, her partner and some friends and i thought yeah why not that would be cool!

So Saturday morning she was having a garage sale and I went around and helped her, that was an experience in itself! But it was fun and meet some lovely old people.

Then we headed off for Aireys Inlet, on the otherside of Torquay.

We stopped in Malmsbury on the way at the Bakery... Never again will i be going to that place!! Charging us for sitting down and eating and didn't even tell us that there was a surcharge until I told them that i think that we had been over charged.

Sheree was given the impression that we were a hop skip and jump away from the beach, so we were like sweet we can get up in the morning and go for a walk along the sand!! Mmmmm well men and impressions!! 2o minutes later out of aireys inlet in the middle of no where amongst some beautiful reserve, along dirt track, after a few turns we hit camp :)

I was so glad to just get there. It had been such a long trip but worth it :)

So I had a ride on the back of a motor bike which was awesome. I used to ride a farm bike when I was younger, which is a bit different to a dirt bike but it was good to get on one again. I think im hooked :)

Then some guys decided that they would go 4WD. and i was like sweet can i go can i go! Well i bloody hell wish i didn't go!! I seriously thought i was going to die! I have been 4WD driving before, but not at night and nothing like this! While we were gone it started raining and the tracks got wet and slippery and we didn't have any idea where we were, luckly Mark had a GPRS!!! We went up a track that was a dead end, then another that the 4WD couldn't even make it up!! So reversing down a hill that you coudln't see was pretty frightening, especially when you don't know where your going and don't know where you going to turn around! For me i hated not being able to see where we were going. I hate that, i was sitting in the back the whole time going "i love you sebastyn" and that the first thing i was going to do when we got back to camp was give sheree the biggest cuddle! Which I did

The next day Mark said to me that they went for a motorbike ride on the tracks that we drove up and he said that if he could of seen where we were going he wouldn't of gone! He said one of the tracks had a huge steep drop at the side!! Awwwwwwww was so glad to still be alive!! I definately got my work out for that hour. My heart rate i swear was going hundred miles an hour!!
An exerpience that i will never forgot and next time be bit more weary before i ask if i can go.

My first official day at work today, i don't go in until the afternoon. I have scripts that i should be practising, but i have been practising them all weekend and feel i know them pretty well!! Suppose i will find out when i go to work today and they test me.

Well off to have a shower and get ready for my big day.

Weigh in Week 11 & Week 12

I haven't updated my weight situation in the past couple of weeks so i thought i would

Week 11 I was 79 kilo and my body fat was 43% so i had a gain which wasn't surprising after the huge losses i had the weeks before..

Week 12 I was 78 kilo and 42.5% body fat so i had a loss...Im feeling so confident about myself and so good about myself. I think getting this job has really helped me! It will be difficult for me to exercise as much now, but i will get 2 hour lunch breaks on a couple of my working days so I will pop into the gym then and work out and do my PT's with sheree.

I GOT A JOB

Yes I got a job.. all in one day!! My God!!!! i am so excited!! about bloody time!!!

I am going to be working for a chiropratic firm in Bendigo. Working 3 and half days a week!! But long days :)

My resume was sent this afternoon, i had a little phone interview then went in for a interview tonite then got a call tonite to say i had the job.

WOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOO

First Ever Family Holiday

Soooo Happy Easter everyone :) I had an awesome weekend until i woke up this morning and noticed that i didn't have a wallet. I had it in the back of Sebs pram and now its gone. We were at the stawell gift yesterday and that was the last place i had it so i have either dropped it somewhere or it was taken! So all of this morning i have been out cancelling cards and getting new ones getting a new licence!! Awwww so much trouble!!!

Anyways we were thinking about going to Canberra for the weekend, but plans were changed and we ended up going to Stawell. Our first ever family holiday! We stayed at a place called Lake Fyans just in between Stawell and Halls Gap. We left Friday afternoon, and my lil car was packed to the brim.

We arrived at about 4.30pm after stopping for a quick break. It was good to see rain for a change!

This was the little cabin that we stayed in. It had an ensuite, a kitchen, sofa bed. It was really cosy and i didn't want to come home! It was so nice to get away from Bendigo for the weekend! To forget about looking at houses and searching for jobs. But the best thing was waking up to the view that we had from our cabin every morning. See pic below. It was just devine!! That is why i didn't want to come home.

So we went to the stawell gift on saturday and monday! It was different and I really enjoy athletics. We watched Tamsyn Lewis run and Patrick Johnson. And even seen Shearer from Big Brother. But i must add that he isn't the country boy that everyone thinks he is. Very much a pretty boy actually!!!

On sunday we went into Halls Gaps and walked to Venus Spas. I couldnt believe how close the fires came to the town. It was amazing. We actually walked through the fires to get the venus spas. I just couldn't stop thinking what happened if the fires burnt the town! It would of been so devasting.

It was good to be able to take Seb to Halls Gap. He loved it! He loved going up to people and running around and playing in the park! The little girl in this picture was so beautiful! She had her little akubra on and she was so cute!!

I was snap happy over the weekend! and seb had enough of me taking photos of him!!! Hehehehehe

It was the first time that adam and I have actaully stayed together since we broke up. There was a few moments but I must admit that it was a really good weekend! It was good to spend time with Adam and we enjoyed each others company which i think is very important. Especially for Sebs sake.

So back to reality now and back into the job hunting and house hunting!

First of All....

I would like send my congratulations to Gwyneth Paltrow for giving birth to a Boy named Moses!!!! Apple and Moses!!! aren't they going to be remember for the rest of their lives!!!

On that note!!! I signed up with two temp agencies last week and had an interview with one today! and got to do a typing test and alpha-numerical test which i did really well in!! Im going to go do an induction tomorrow and then i will become official on their books fors any temp work that comes available! So im pretty excited about that!!!

My weekend was really boring really didnt do much except exercise and went for a bike ride with my brother!! watched my dad play superrules footyball. (which is footy for the old farts)!!!

I started 8 weeks of job search training with my employment agency yesterday and i was so bored... i ended up doing a new resume for myself :) Next week i have 3 days of it!!! Ohhh im looking forward to that!!!

Nothing much really to update you with!! Still job hunting still house hunting still no luck with any so will keep plodding along!!

See Ya

Is my body telling me something?

I think im getting old :) LOL!!! I think my body is telling me to have a rest or not work so hard. I woke up this morning with a very very sore left shoulder. i think from two days straights of pushing myself in weights, and tonite i just went for a 45 minute run :) and my right calf muscle is damn sore!!! like hurts to walk on! Yes im stretching !!!! Might just have a rest day tomorrow or go for a light walk. LOL!!! my exercise craving should end soon!!!!

By the way Beckie i had a look at those sites and didn't find anything that was me. So anyone out there that knows of anyone or any good sites that have templates for blogs could you let me know please.... Cheers time for hot shower and think about whats for tea!! Mmmmmm noodle box sounds YUM!!

Weigh in Week 10 - "The Craving Continues"

oh my god oh my god.. did we watch Biggest loser tonite.. the contestants are back!!!! i heard today that the person who left the house that has lost the most weight will be given a wild card!! MMmm that will make things interesting

Ok so i have been craving exercise this week and yesterday i had my PT session and then i went back into the gym for a work out, this morning i was up at 7.30 and went for a walk/run. It was bloody cold... but i was so damn proud of myself because i actually ran all the way from the res to my home street. which took me about 10 minutes... its the first time that i have done it... Yaaaahhhhhh ME!!!!!! And then i was in the gym tonite and I did pump... And pushed myself really really hard!!!! I now can't feel my arms after two days of intense weights!! Iam starting to feel that more positive that i be about things the better it is for me to loss tis weight!!

Sooooo today was weigh in and all this hard work and extra work has been paying off .... I lost 2.2% body fat this week!!!! I am so damn happy!!! that is alot in one week!! I was saying to sheree today in our slim meeting how i am seeing definition in my legs!! Its good!!! I am noticing changes to my body!! My double chin has got little and i am starting to fit into clothes that i havent been able to in a while!! My mind is feeling great, and im feeling optimistic about life!!! Im only young and i have so much to learn, but i just feel that if i have a healthy body i have a healthy mind!!

K im going to have a shower!!!

Thats what friends are for

Heya All

I had another intense PT session this morning and was yet again on the verge of vomiting!!! I think sheree just loves making me feel like it!!

But as you all know im a great friends with Beck and these days it has been hard to catch up with her!! Anyways she rang me today, and we spoke for ever!! I think we could talk each others ears off all day and night long if we got the chance :) would you agree beckie?? Anyways the point im getting at is that i was telling her today about how I hate feeling like im going to vomit and beckie being beckie made me look at it as a positive thing! She said to me " think of the sick feeling as a good feeling that you are working hard and your being pushed to your limits" And I was like yeah, I should look at this as a positive feeling! So thanks Becks you always know how to make situations better! Its good to have someone to talk to about mother issues and other general issues. I look at her as a mother figure in ways as she is a bit older than me, but so wise and knowledgable, and full of advise!! :)

So as you know she is heading back to work on Monday and i am so damn proud of her, so I am now incharge of getting our OFFICIAL lingerie website up and running once its done we will let everyone know!! Its going to take a bit but i have so much time on my hands it will keep me occupied.

I have been really focused over the last 3 days with my excerise as you know i have been addicted!!! I even went in to the gym again this afternoon and did a cardio session!! These cravings will stop soon!!! I also have been focused on job hunting, i had an interview with my employment agency and i will be doing some sessions over the next 8 weeks in interview techniques, resumes, job hunting blaah blaah, even though i don't have to go back to work i need to for the money! Anyways i thought why don't i put my name down for some temp work. so this morning after i had my PT session and went and looked at a house, i came home made myself look pretty and went took my resume in to, two temp employment agencies. So now i get to go and do the fun thing of having tests done to see how fast i type what skills i actually do have! So that will be interesting, as i don't really know how fast i type!!! Im looking forward to it.

Im trying to keep a positive outlook on everything! If i keep getting upset and think negatively about things then i am going to show that when i speak to people!

Well i have weigh in tomorrow, i excited to see how i have gone this week!

Im seeing Lil man tonite since i have not seen him since monday! Its been tough but i have focussed my energies in other areas so i wouldn't get upset about it..... until im lying in bed lookin at the empty cot! hopefully once i get a house it will be a bit easier on me as when i don't have him i can shut his bedroom door!! and won't have to worry about looking at an empty cot anymore.

Well better go and make the unit baby proof for my lil man.

Cheers Ya Ol'

ITS TIME TO GO

Ok so as you all know I am looking for a place to live, and ladies I really don't want to take all the lingerie that I have with me. SO PLEASE go check out the LINGERIE it all needs to go!!!! Tell your friends, tell your mum, tell your sisters your work collegues, tell everyone and tell your husbands!!

GO CRAZY LADIES!!!

Im Craving Exercise

Yes im craving excercise!! I don't know why, of all things......why can't i be craving chocolate, or ice cream or lollies......?? My Bro and I went shopping yesterday and we brought him a bike. So we went for a huge big bike ride yesterday in the bush, it was lots of fun and very hard work on my legs.. but i was proud that i pushed my self up some steep hills!!! Sooo we got home after about an hour of bike riding and I was ok im off into the gym to do some weights!!! then i got home last nite, and I wanted to do more!!! I was up again this morning and into the gym and did an hour cardio session!!!! awww my poor "no bum" it is so sore after bike riding...... yet i got on the bike at gym today..... now im sitting here writing this blog and thinking about changing my clothes and going out for some more excerise!!! Im not feeling guilty about anything that is for sure, maybe its because im bored and i don't have lil man this week. So on that note im going to go and check my timetable and see what classes are on the gym and if there is nothing there that interests me i might go do some excerise around the res!

Thank you Beckie for your comments about seb and sleeping!! i appreciate it i tell you!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU

Happy Birthday my precious lil man.. Your finely a year old. How quickly the time flies :)
I thank you for so much for becoming part of my life and i treasure that smile of yours every day! Im a very lucky mum

Love You Lots of hugs and kisses

Mummy
xxxxx

My Lil Mans Day

Sooo my family came over today to celebrate Sebs birthday! It was a really nice day and we went to the park and had lunch and the lil ones had a play on the park. It was a really relaxing day. Seb got some money, so building blocks, some books, some music cds and a lil carasol that plays music. it was really beautiful! So I got some pictures below to share with you all.

This is me just showing you my progress so far

My nephew Taj and Seb eating pizza

Seb on a springing Sheep

If you look closely my dad has a napkin on his head. he forgot his hat!! Sexy Look Dad

This is my parsie!! he is just sooo cute!!! He forgot his hat too!!!

Thank you all for such a great Day!! I love when my family gets together!

xxx

Oh my god oh my God

Well my family is coming up today to celebrates Seb's birthday!! And i thought why don't i try on my favourite jeans and see if they fit me yet.. I have not been able to wear them since i was pregnant!! AND GUESS WHAT!!!!!! they fit me :) Ill get some photos today of my family, and my fav jeans :)

My patience bubble burst

So i have gone the last 3 nights without sleep.. and last nite my patience bubble burst! I know lil man can't help it that he is teething but to cry for 2 hours straight was the last straw for me! I broke down. There is nothing I could do and it was killing me that he was in so much pain. He is not a very good sleepa to start with, and not being well or teething just makes it worse. My poor brother he has been so patient with me and i felt so sorry for him last nite, because the poor bugger had to get up to go to work today! He said to me this morning that he was ready to grab his doona and go and sleep in his car!! :(

So im on a mission this week to speak to my Maternal Nurse and see what options I have to help him sleep well and for me also to get a good nite sleep.... Even to have a 5 hour straight sleep will be a bonus!! If anyone has tips im open for suggestions :)

So all my family is coming up tomorrow and we are going to a park down the road from my bros flat and having a little get together for sebbie for his birthday! It will be exciting to see what everyone has got him!

Well My lil one is having a nap so i might have a snooze meself!

Weigh in - Week 9

I NO LONGER WEIGH 80!! Yes you read correctly. I lost 1.8 kilo this week, which takes me to 78.5 kgs!!! Good work Nessie :) My body fat went up a little, just gotta drink more water!! I am now so close to my first major goal of losing 10 kilos!!! I have to work that little harder to get my body fat down but i will get there! I just feel so good that I am achieving this! Its good motivation for me that I am losing weight nearly everyweek, because I know that I am doing what I am suppose to. But I need to focus more on my body fat and reducing it!

Im still feeling a little stiff after my PT session, not only do i have sore muscles but i have very nice war wounds on my elbows from carpet burn from commando crawling!!! Mmm never again!!!

I message sheree yesterday and told her that i felt like i had been hit by a truck, i could not move, i could not pick seb up from the cot!! and she said something to me that i wanted to share with you because i think it makes a lot of sense. She message me back saying "Remember pain is just the weakness leaving the body" and I so believe that! It can mean so many things! Your working yourself so hard to be that stronger person!

Everyone on weight lose challenges, be proud of your achievements and be positive and stay positive and know that you have my support! Goals can be achieved and there is more to losing than weight than just how much you weigh! and I have come to realise that! As long as your feeling better about yourself, feeling stronger, fitter, healthier than you are on the road to success!

Pushed to my Limits

Hi!!! i can just write.. im still shaking actually!!! Well what a busy afternoon one has had.. at 2pm i had a PT with Sheree!! Mmmmmm well as you are aware i did my ankle so we did upper body work!!! and I was Pushed to limits...Pushed that hard i had to stop because i was going to be sick!! That feeling is so horrible..it has now been two hours since then and im still not feeling well!!! I have never ever ever felt like that ever from excerising!! I said to her i feel like the biggest losers!! I now know how hard they are training!!! I know that it is worth it all in the long run!! and I have the best Personal Trainer, who knows what I am capable of (even when i feel like i can't do something) and pushes me to my limits!! and for that I am greatful!! She really knows when to put on her hard hat :) But i have war wounds today!! she made me crawl along the floor with my arse in the air and i now have burns on my elbows!! :( Try it, its hard work!!!

Soo my PT finished and I had a quick shower and it was off to my 2nd job interview for the same job! Will find out friday if I have it. Would be a good job.. I would enjoy it.. something new and something challenging and I like a challenge!!

Well think i might go and skull a glass of water and go pick my baby up from creche!! Hopefully me might sleep tonite!!! His eye teeth are coming through!!!

Thoughts

I am angry at this blog at the moment. my brother went and seen the sand sculptures in Rye on the weekend and I have been trying to upload the pictures so you can all see how beautiful they are! But its not letting me!

Anyways I couldn't sleep last nite, and its really getting to me! Im trying to stay so positive about everything, but you just get to a point where your like well fuck it!! And im at the point right now! My brain is so clouded with trying to find a job and trying to find a house, having no money, and adam and sebsastyn and trying to lose weight and get health and fit, I wonder where I actually are in all of this? I know im there somewhere :) And i know that the light is at the end of the tunnel but by god the tunnel is getting really long for me at the moment! It feels like it is never ending! And I know that once I hear that I have a house or that I have a job that my view and thoughts on everything will change again!

I can hear my lil man stirring, which means he just woke from one big longggg sleep!! So on that note i am going to leave you with this quote:

Andy Warhol:
They say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.

One Week To Go.........

.................Until my precious lil boy turns one.

Here is a photo of him not long after he was born!!! You might notice the little bruise on his eye, it was from the forcepts!!!

He has grown up so fast! this year has gone so fast!! I still remember the first time he was put in my arms!! still makes me cry! Its such a precious moment that i will remember for ever!

Interview No 2

So I have a second interview on Wednesday with a company called Building solutions! Ohh so exciting!!!

I didn't get the flat i wanted, which i am really disappointed about because it was perfect location but to make me feel better "i was second in line" Awww dagger in the heart!!! Ill move on and keep going i suppose. i just feel like i will be stuck here forever!!

I have had mixed emotions the last couple of days! I have been spending lots of quality time with adam and seb which has been really nice, and yesterday after lunch with Becki, Bradman, Phillipa and David, i went and met adam and seb at the lake, but I got really upset when it was time to go!! The feeling of us all not going home together as a family and me not having my baby with me after such a lovely afternoon was really heart breaking. I thought this was suppose to get easier??? When Bloody When??? Opppss i used that word bloody!!!!! i might be on the front page of the paper tomorrow...

Well I have had a really huge day today. it started at 7.15am when my alarm went off for me to get up and get ready to go to Melbourne with Sheree. It was a very long day, but it was good to get out of Bendigo for the day!!! Thanks Sheree!!!

Well my lil boy is fast asleep in Bed, and not very well today, think hes got more teeth coming through so im going to go and lounge on the couch and watch commander in chief!!

Nite nite

xxx

Ohh so quiet

Soo im sitting in the loungeroom and its just me, the air con and my fingers typing this post that are making noise!!! Just thinking what to do for tea tonite actually! I thawed out some steak and wondering if to cut it up to make a stir -fry! I might do that actually something simple!!

Well this is a big week for me. I had my three job interviews last week and they all said that they would get back to me this week ( two of them for second interviews), and also will hear about this unit! Soooo please please some good news come out of it! I really need a job, i got my centrelink payment today and its gone already!! My clothes are getting big on me and I need to buy some new ones, but can't really do that without a job! It really sucks not having any money! And i really need a place of my own! I miss all my stuff that is packed away in boxes!! After talking about photos today, I miss all of them too!!

Well im off to go and clean my room! Ohh should i say put all my washing away

Random Quotes

I found these quotes and I really liked them so I thought that I would share them with you

Start by doing what’s necessary, then what’s possible,and suddenly you are doing the impossible.

Saint Francis
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Hard work doesn't guarantee success, but improves its chances.

Author: B. J. Gupta
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Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.

Author: Harriet Beecher Stowe (1811-1886), author
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Nobody ever drowned in his own sweat.

Author: Ann Landers

I Wish................

To have someone snuggle me at night

Weigh in - Week 8 plus measurements

Soooo my weight and body fat was the same this week but i got my measurements done.. I lost 15cms this month.. how exciting 6cms on my bum!! LOL no wonder I have no bum.. So knowing that in 2 months i have lost 30cms i am on cloud 9!! I feel so damn good!!! A whole ruler length!!! Sooo i know that im on the right track!!!

Well had my interview today with FRH it went good!! will find out next week.

Im having my lil boy tonite as adam has hockey tomorrow 4 comm games!! Can't wait!!

Its Karma

My ankle is feeling pretty good today! it has a little bruise on the ankle bone...

I have decided that its karma that i have done my ankle! After last week with all shit that i ate i decided that i did my ankle so that i couldn't work out this week, so my results would be shit!!

Thats my theory!!

Soo my busy week has calmed down thank god!!! I have put two applications in for to units so hopefully something comes of it.. if it doesn't i just keep trying!!! Gotta stay positive!!

I have got another job interview tomorrow!! Im kinda over them i tell you repeating myself over and over again!! Someone just give me a job PLEASE!!!

Soooo I caught up with my friend Rinda today!!! she is so beautiful!!! All of my friends keep me grounded in so many different ways!

Well just about to have some lunch!! so better go rescue it before i burn it!!

Will let you know how i go with weigh in and interview tomorrow

xxx

I have an injury

So i was eager this morning i went into the gym and was doing combat, my i say i was up at 5.45am for a 6.15am start, we were on the last track, and bang my left ankle went!!Yup im out of action, of all bloody days!! I have two job interviews today so aren't I going to be remembered!

Well better get this ice pack off 4 twenty minutes!! :(

Busy Busy Beaver

What a day and week i have ahead of me

Today i have lived at the gym. This morning I did Body Pump and a little bit of cardio then i went back into the gym tonite and did TTT and Body Combat!! Man i am buggered but i feel good.

The rest of my week consists of the following

WED

10.30 Job Interview
11.30 Job Interview
2.00 Personal Training Session
3.45 Looking at a house

Thursday

11.00 Looking at a house

Friday

11.00 Weigh in week 8 and measurements

11.45 Job Interview

So I figure that my resume must be doing some good!

Well im off to get some tea!! Mmmm im hungry!!!

Just a photo

My dad just sent me this photo of seb.... i went and stayed with my dad last week and we were outside.. i think this is beautiful photo of him !!

Productive Day

Well after my shit start to the day i have actually had a very productive day.

I wrote a list of all the things that I needed to do today and I have completed everything except 3 things, and there was 10 things on my list.

• I did our Bas Statement
• I paid some money to china
• I applied for some jobs
• I asked sheree what time my PT is on Wednesday as i forgot
• I contacted a real estate agent
• I went and had a drive by a unit, i was interested in but not anymore after seeing it!! (they always make them look so pretty in photos)
• Printed off some photos.

So I went into the gym and sweated out some frustration for 40 minutes, and I was going to go into the gym tonite to do pilates, but i remember that Desperate housewives is on so i will just go for a walk around the res instead.

Not a good start to Monday

Real Estate agents!!! Im not a happy Jam right now!!! I rang a real estate agent this morning, to tell them that I rang them 2 weeks ago about a property that i was interested looking through. Anyway the girl told me that my application wasn't successful and i said hang on a minute, i haven't even looked through the place yet. You told me that you would ring me. She said sorry we have approved a person who didn't look through it!! Im like ohh thanks for that!!!

Im just really pissed off that they didn't contact me, when they said they would! It was in the ideal location for me, and i didn't even have the opportunity!

Anyways so im now applying for a couple of jobs and then heading into the gym to sweat my anger out!!!

Have a wonderful day people

xx